"I've seen a lot of cats, and they're just not interesting enough for me to hate."
"I mean, really, what do cats do? They sit around and sleep a lot. They walk around the house with no apparent purpose. When they want something, they'll try to get you to feed them. And when they get so amazingly bored by the stupefying tedium that is a cat's life, they'll play with a mouse. Just to keep their hand in, you know."
"The average cat person doesn't have much of a personality to begin with. They're so totally average that talking to them is like listening to Muzak."
"And then they see this animal that just lays around all the time, and they say, 'Hey! This animal is more boring than I am!'"