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Friday, April 11, 2003

Medical Insurance Phone Follies

I had to call our health insurance company today to straighten out some billing. Which leads me to wonder, why don't they just use THIS as their voicemail phone greeting:

Thank you for calling XYZ insurance. You call is unimportant to us. Because of a predictably high volume of calls we're busy ignoring, you might experience a delay long enough to make you hang up. Please note than many of your questions probably won't be answered on our Web site, but we want to you to go there anyway so we won't have to deal with you. If you have nothing better to do, please choose from the following options:

To hear your claim denied in English, press one now.
To hear your claim denied in Spanish, press two now.
To speak to an underpaid, undertrained customer disservice representative, press three now.
To get another voicemail menu that will not help you, press four now.
To leave a message in a voicemailbox that is full and unable to accept new messages, press five now.

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