1. I used to work as a sock garter model, but had to quit when the photographer wanted me to reveal more leg than I was comfortable with.
2. Instead adding chopped nuts to my ice cream sundae, I use kitty litter.
3. I firmly believe "Garlic and Onion Crest" will become the next hit toothpaste.
4. Sometimes I let my cat drive my car. Unless she's drunk.
5. Adolescence was smoothe and uneventful.
6. I urinate only once, maybe twice, each day.
7. Caffeine doesn't do much for me, but I love the refreshing lift I get from room-temperature tap water.
8. I spend my free time balancing my checkbook and making sure I don't owe the government any money from previous tax filings.
9. I'm a member of the Enema-of-the-Month Club.
10. I sell my fingernail clippings on eBay.