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Wednesday, August 28, 2002

You Won't Believe The Low, Low Prices
Just Ask the Red Army!

I read in the paper today that a liquor store in New York is trying to attract Russian immigrants with an ad using an old Soviet Army recruiting poster. In the original poster, a soldier points at the viewer and says, "Comrade! Have you volunteered?"

The ad was modified with this wording, "Comrade! Do you know where the lowest prices are?"

I wish I could find the article online so I could link to it.

What's next? Joe Stalin selling Kitty Litter? Leon Trotsky toilet paper? Karl Marx Hemorrhoid Cream? (Sufferers unite! You have nothing to lose but itching and burning!)

One of the fraternities at my college held a Community Party. All the drinks included vodka, and we greeted each other with long, propagandistic slogans such as:

Me: "Hello, Comrade! What have you done today for the cause of glorious revolutionary egalitarianism?"
Him: "I attended an economics lecture in which we discussed redistrubion of wealth from parasite bourgeoisie to the workers who should, in fact, own the means of production."
Me: "You have done much today, and I will recommend you for extra hours of harvest labor on the collective farm."
Him: "You bastard."
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